Protein Comes from the Sun

This is an opinion piece. I am not a nutritionist (besides they are “in on it”), but am a health hobbyist experimenting on myself. I am a nearly lifelong vegetarian. I develop software for a living.

The science is in! New research proves protein comes from the sun.

Actually, no. Maybe in sort of a circle of life, Hakuna Matata way it does, but the notion is as scientifically sound as everything else we’ve been taught about nutrition in my lifetime.

Since 1973 whenever it comes out that I don’t eat meat the following occurs:

First someone exclaims “No meat?!” then:

  • Where do you get your protein? Or:
  • Is it for health or the Peta sort of thing? (and someone will make the “People Eating Tasty Animals” joke) Or:
  • I couldn’t live without my meat. (all nod) Or, if only males present:
  • You eat <censored sexual reference> don’t you? (All ROFL and drink.)

We are here to address bullet one “Where do you get your protein?”

Isn’t it funny that you can live off Coke, pizza, burgers, fried foods, etc. and no one is concerned, but let them find out you live off fruit and vegetables and they are suddenly worried about your diet. “Where do you get your protein? Do you take calcium supplements? What about B vitamins? No milk? Where do you get your vitamin D?”

For the first 30-ish years, when asked about protein, I said I ate cheese, which people reluctantly conceded might be OK. Now being vegan, I fall back to saying I eat nuts, or beans and rice, which often elicits an affirmation of the “complete protein” myth from someone. It holds that you must combine complimentary proteins. This is a fallacy first put forth in Frances Moore Lappé’s 1971 bestseller “Diet for a Small Planet.” [1] It has been accepted as fact and is now “common knowledge.” Current thinking is that you don’t have to eat these foods together to get the protein.

Per Wikipedia, proteins are “linear chains of amino acids.” [2] Most foods contain amino acids. To get enough protein you probably just have to eat food.

Why all the hysteria over protein? It’s just one of many vital nutrients. Conspiracy! It’s a scam to fleece the mooches. The meat/dairy industry in collusion with the FDA has created an artificial demand for protein by setting an arbitrarily high target for protein in dietary guidelines. The purpose is to move more product, not to make healthy humans. Likewise with calcium, and the danger of UV rays, but one scam at a time. In the future current meat advertising will be understood to be just as ludicrous as old ads promoting the health benefits of Coke, opiates and cigarettes.

Even quack medical doctors begrudge that there might be some link between health and diet. A few may even go so far as to recommend eating more fruit and vegetables and to limit meat intake–but only after a heart attack.

Instead of worrying about getting enough protein, people should be concerned about getting enough light, by eating raw plant-based foods and spending time outdoors.

[1] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Protein_combining

[2]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amino_acid

Originally posted by Steve Swann at 12/4/2010 9:21 PM

Tentacles?!

There’s a great scene in one of the Indiana Jones movies where they serve up chilled monkey brains and the girl just isn’t having any of it.

Chilled Monkey Brains

Chilled Monkey Brains

I had a similar experience at dinner tonight. The whole Fulin’s Asian Cuisine visit was discombobulated from the get-go. We were seated in an echo chamber. There was no silverware or napkins. I had to walk the restaurant in search of our waitress to ask for some after our salads came out. Everything took forever. But finally they brought out my vegetable tofu casserole, which had the description “For the vegetarian in all of us” below it on the menu. It came in a little covered casserole dish. It’s what I always get. I scooped the vegetables and tofu cubes onto my plate beside the brown rice.

I was moving it around inspecting one of the tofu cubes. It appeared to have blown out. It was flatter than it should have been and the color was off. Looking closer I saw it had long grooves and little circles. That’s odd. Puckered circular shapes in long rows… “AAAAAAHHHHHH! TENTACLES!” I think I might have yelled as I shoved the top on it and pushed it all to the center of the table.

It was truly traumatizing! A large black couple at the next table was having a good laugh at my expense until I made eye contact with them and they looked down and resumed eating.

The manager partially comped our dinner, which was still over $100. I don’t know if I can go back there. I guess I’ll get over it. But seriously, body parts? Arms? Tentacles in your dinner? Sick!

Global Time Loss!

Global warming, climate change, the gravity shortage… It’s all bad, but we can each and every one of us do our part. Ride mass transit, go vegan, store heavy objects as low as possible. You know the drill.

Now it’s June 1st already! I’m spreading the word about Global Time Loss! (GTL!) People used to say that as you get older, time passes more and more quickly. But I just saw on Twitter where one of my very young, otherwise healthy, Twitter friends remarked “Holy cow it’s 6/1 already? Where’s the time going??” If even she’s affected, what about those of us already at high risk? Time will fly. GTL! June? Hell I’m still tripping over Christmas ornaments!

What causes GTL!? Man. Obviously. By overpopulating our planet and guzzling its resources we are literally eating Earth alive. As it is consumed it naturally becomes lighter, which in turn makes it spin faster, and orbit faster. Speeding time.

I know what you’re thinking. “Steve, what can I do to fight GTL!?”

First, knowledge is power. Spread the word about GTL!. Then start conserving today:

  • Set your calendar back five minutes.
  • Multitask more, harder, faster.
  • Speed.
  • Don’t even think about stopping for yellow lights.
  • If you drink Tall, go Grande. Already Grande? Go Venti.
  • Dammit quit writing checks!

There are thousands of ways to cut corners!

GTL!: The time to save is now.

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